"truth must be spoken of as it is"

South Korea has a reputation for being a sexually conservative society, but it's also one where secret cameras in women's bathrooms are a rampant social problem, and the drugging and gang-raping of women in a nightclub leads to very little consequence for the (famous, wealthy) perpetrators.  So it's a shame that small steps towards balanced, comprehensive sex education have once again been shot down by the government:

"Contrary to parents’ belief that sex education will lead to their children having more sex, earlier, a survey on the aftereffects that CSE [comprehensive sexuality education] demonstrated on sexual behaviors revealed that 37 percent of 87 countries that were surveyed said its students had delayed initiation of sex after education, 31 percent said the frequency of sex was reduced and the use of condoms increased in 40 percent of the countries. 

 

Rather than lingering on the ministry’s already-made decision, Nam Yoon-jeong, the president of Think Sing Together who led the Nadaum project, hoped that this incident could be turned into an opportunity to talk about sex education and how sex is dealt with in Korea.

 

'Korea had been lacking proper sex education and any discussion on sex or human rights has been shut down whenever it began,' said Nam. 'We are exposed to sexual consumption and imagery everyday and everywhere, but an ironic stoic sentiment forbids us from talking about it publicly or officially. The ambivalent culture leads to children wondering about something they are exposed to, but getting twisted ideas of it because they’re not taught properly about what it is exactly. The truth must be spoken of as it is.'”

Nothing good can come of a hyper-sexualized society that can't talk openly and plainly about sex, contraception, homosexuality, sexual violence, and gender equality.  And if you click through for pictures, you'll notice that these so called "controversial" books are about as tame as can be.

You're Only Un-Electable or Un-Likable Until You Get Elected.

It's no secret my top two choices for the Democratic nominee were Elizabeth Warren and Kamala Harris.  Megan Garber unpacks exactly how the fraudulent "electability" or "likability" arguments get weaponized, over and over and over, against women like them but not so much the dudes:

"And, still, you won’t be able to prove it. The thing about internalized misogyny is that it is internal. 'Likability' is in a very broad sense a foundational requirement of any candidate. So is that other deeply subjective data point, 'authenticity.' The plausible deniability is baked into the logic of campaigning. Sexism, like racism, is both exhausting and exhaust-like: It is so common that people sometimes forget to be indignant about its presence. 'Electability' finds refuge in the fog. Instead of a woman, just not that woman, its explanation of things is I’m not sexist; other people are. Did they not vote for the woman because they have low opinions of women, or because they assume that other people do? You can litigate the question endlessly. That is, in some sense, the point.

In late 2008, the researchers David Paul and Jessi L. Smith published an article examining what happens when women run against men for the presidency. 'Although some polls indicate that 81 percent of Americans would personally vote for a qualified woman candidate from their party,' they wrote, 'other [2005] polls imply that nearly one‐third of Americans believe their "neighbors" are unwilling to vote for a woman.' And in a poll conducted in June and published in The Daily Beast, 74 percent of independents and Democrats claimed to be personally comfortable with the notion of a female president. Only 33 percent thought their neighbors would be similarly open-minded. In a New York Times article last summer, a voter said about Warren, 'I love her enthusiasm. She’s smart, she’s very smart. I think she would make an amazing president.' The voter added: 'I’m worried about whether she can win.'”

I like the specific focus on language here -- electability and likability really are incredibly vague concepts that masquerade as objective currency stamped by Chuck Todd or Chris Matthews' (RIP) omniscient political instincts.

"I don't think he / she is electable / likable" is literally just a statement of opinion.  It's just that David Brooks gets paid millions for saying it, and you don't.

Donald Trump was un-electable (pussy grabber, obvious racist, charlatan).  So was Barack Obama (too young, too black).

But somehow history will look at them as long-shots who got lucky.  (True!)  But somehow Warren and Harris (and Hillary four years earlier) will be remembered as too ambitious and too cold and let's be honest, too damn bitchy and uppity.

It's as if internalized misogyny in America is as terrible as internalized racism, if not worse!

(Also fuck Chuck Todd forever.)

Toxic Masculinity Is A Thing

The amount of denial it takes for any grown-ass man to say toxic masculinity doesn't exist is pretty incredible.

— Baby New James (@wetcasements) January 15, 2019

Feminism And Food In South Korea

South Korean men love to talk about how certain Korean foods and alcohols give "stamina" to all the dudes.  And by "stamina," of course they mean great big boners:

"'It is popular to talk about stamina foods,' said Jung Seo-young, a chef and founder of Bburi Kitchen, a traditional Korean cooking school. '[Korean] society is very conservative, and talking about one’s sex life is taboo,' so talking about 'stamin' is a subtle way to broach the subject.

Besides associations with traditional concepts of healing, male-oriented foods are often touted for their anthropomorphic qualities, said Jung.'For example, an octopus’s [phallus-shaped] tentacles moves vigorously. In [texts] from the Chosun dynasty [1392–1910], they advised people to eat it for stamina.'

Jenna Park, a 26-year-old recent graduate in Seoul, said that her ex-boyfriend would tell her not to eat all of the eel when they went out for dinner together. 'He said the tails, which are said to be the most powerful part of the eel, were better to be eaten by men like him.'

Female sexuality, however, remains a major taboo, and foods in Korea that are catered to women usually focus on beauty or motherhood."

In English, there's no good word for "male slut" because sexually adventurous men are considered virile, handsome, and capable.

You can see the transposition here to Korean food -- there are no female stamina foods, because sexual ability isn't something women are supposed to enjoy, let alone compare and revel in with their female friends.

And it is shocking to live in a country that is known for being so sexually conservative (repressed?) but routinely walking into a noodle restaurant decorated with thick wooden cocks (no accident -- the glans have all been lovingly polished) or, as mentioned and pictured, being invited to end a rigorous hike with a few shots of Erection Wine.

Hell, I don't even react to the double-barber pole handjob parlors any more.

Cultural coding is for real.

Anyhow, it seems like I've been bringing in some pretty mine-laden topics to my adult classes recently, but they've responded well and more openly than I expected.  And there are still plenty of "neutral" topics I bring in for them, but I think for a long time I've underestimated their willingness to talk about their personal experiences as Koreans.