Tuesday, October 24, 2023

Eldercare Is Never Easy And Always Hard

This Vox piece gives a pretty good overview of just how difficult (and expensive!) eldercare can be, and how a generation of Boomers going into their Twilight Years is going to be rough for lots of their grown children:

"Boomers themselves have driven tectonic shifts in American cultural norms and family structures — a revolution in divorce, along with a trend toward smaller families and away from multigenerational living — that could make that backbone weaker. Compared to their elders, boomers will have fewer people in their lives able to step in and care for them as they age, says Rachel Margolis, a demographer and sociologist at the University of Western Ontario. In 2010, there were more than seven potential family caregivers for every person over 80; by 2030, that ratio is expected to fall to 4:1, and by 2050, it will be less than 3:1, according to AARP. More care responsibilities will fall on fewer family members, most of them adult children, who may find themselves caring for loved ones alone or with little help, sometimes across two different households."

Me and my sister are living this right now.  If I haven't mentioned it here, I have told my friends -- my Dad has excellent health care and a real pension after three decades of high level Federal work.  And even with those resources, a lot of genuine sacrifices and hard decisions still had to be made.  And more will come going forward as he approaches the age of 95.

My only suggestion?  Let the children of older folks pay some reasonable amount to go on their parents' health insurance if they give up work to take care of their mom or dad.

And the move to (return to?) multigenerational homes seems an obvious and necessary trend.

Sunday, October 22, 2023

Brain Games

I'm liking Connections.  Is it bragging to say I'm pretty good at it?  Seems like you just want to think in parallel terms about possible proper nouns -- names, movies, common expressions -- before you start clicking away.

Wordle still kicks my butt of course.

Sunday, October 8, 2023

Moving Right Along

I started a new job last week and it's going pretty well.

For those keeping score, I had part-time job this past summer working as a jobs counselor for younger folks.  Now I'm full-time in an education-related field here in lovely Frederick.  Not to be coy, as I'll probably give more details later.

As mentioned, I'm also living with my Dad who is a hale and hearty 94.  We made this move for a number of reasons, but basically the nursing home wasn't working out.  Nothing terrible was going on, he just wasn't getting enough social stimulation for the very hard-working but over-tasked staff.

We have some wonderful nurses coming in during the day, allowing me to go to work.  It's tough somedays.  He's becoming less and less mobile, and it's more difficult to communicate with him and understand (fully) what his needs are.

I woke up this morning to a great big windstorm, as it seems fall has finally arrived in Maryland.  My back is sore from lifting my Dad improperly a few times (just once is really all it takes!  use those legs!).  I'm taking life and work one day at time, as much as it's possible not to worry about the future (mortality for starters, and also the fact that I'm on a one-year contract and will yet again be applying for jobs come next summer).

The Orioles lost last night in their first playoff appearance since who knows when.  Nothing will make you a realist quicker than caring for somebody approaching 95.  But part of me is looking forward to the second game this afternoon, come what may.

Losing is fine.  But not believing better days lie ahead?  That's for suckers.